15 October 2007

Wogs as Apaches

I was reading a piece in Wikipedia about North and South Waziristan (hey, I have diverse interests, fuck you) and came to the sudden realization that, in relative terms, the Pakistanis are just fighting the same Indian Wars that we did a hundred years ago.
As the article said:
"North Waziristan (Urdu: شمالی وزیرستان) is the northern part of Waziristan, a mountainous region of northwest Pakistan, bordering Afghanistan and covering some 11 585 km² (4,473 mi²). It comprises the area west and south-west of Peshawar between the Tochi river to the north and the Gomal river to the south, forming part of Pakistan's Federally Administered Tribal Areas (FATA). Miran Shah is capital of North Waziristan. The North-West Frontier Province lies immediately to the east. The region was an independent tribal territory from 1893, remaining outside of the British empire and Afghanistan. Tribal raiding into British territory was a constant problem for the British, requiring frequent punitive expeditions between 1860 and 1945. The region became part of Pakistan on independence in 1947.
Waziristan is divided into two "agencies", North Waziristan and South Waziristan, with estimated populations (as of 1998) of 361,246 and 429,841 respectively. The two parts have quite distinct characteristics, though both tribes are subgroups of the Waziris and speak a common Waziri language. They have a formidable reputation as warriors and are known for their frequent blood feuds. Traditionally, feuding local Waziri religious leaders have enlisted outsiders in the Pakistani government, and U.S. forces hunting al-Qaeda fugitives, in attempts at score-settling. The tribes are divided into sub-tribes governed by male village elders who meet in a tribal jirga. Socially and religiously Waziristan is an extremely conservative area. Women are carefully guarded, and every household must be headed by a male figure. Tribal cohesiveness is so strong that there are so-called Collective Responsibility Acts in the Frontier Crimes Regulation.
In 1910 North Waziristan Agency was constituted as a full fledged agency with its headquarters at Miranshah. It is inhabited by the Pashtun Wazirs and Daurs tribes. The agency lies from 32.35 degrees to 33.22 degrees latitudes and 69.22 degrees to 70.38 degrees longitudes. It is bounded on the north by Afghanistan, Kurram Agency and Hangu District, on the east by Tribal Areas Adjoining Bannu District and Tribal Area Adjoining Karak and Bannu Districts. On the south by South Waziristan Agency and on the west also by Afghanistan. The total area of the agency is 4,707 square kilometres (1,817 sq mi)."

See? Tribes. Agencies. Warring factions. Tough mountain warriors with an attitude.
Apaches, just like I said.
Now, I don't know that we're ever going to be running tours into Waziristan to watch the locals make jewelry and rugs, but it's worth a hope, ain't it?
Of course, we had to send in several punitive expeditions of our own, and kill a lot of Apaches and even Navajos (who, trust me, do not remember Kit Carson fondly) before they settled down and became good neighbors...

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