18 September 2006

Bill gets a boat

The description of the USS William Jefferson Clinton had made the rounds as an email, but this is the first known photo of it:

The ship is the first of its kind in the Navy and is a legacy to President Bill Clinton “for his foresight in military budget cuts” and his conduct while president. The ship is constructed entirely from recycled aluminum and is completely solar powered, with a top speed of five knots. Its arsenal is comprised of one (unarmed) aircraft which, although it cannot be launched or captured on the 100-foot flight deck, displays a very menacing presence. As a standing order, there are no firearms allowed on board.
The 20 person crew is completely diversified, including all races, creeds, sexes, and sexual orientations. The crew, like the crew aboard the USS Jimmy Carter, is trained to avoid conflicts and appease enemies of the United States at all costs. An on-board Type One DNC Universal Translator can send out messages of apology in any language to anyone who finds America offensive.
The ship’s purpose is not defined as a unit of national defense; in times of conflict the USS Clinton has orders to seek refuge in Canada.
The ship was renamed and commissioned USS William J Clinton when someone realized that USS Blowfish was already taken.
author unknown

Of course, even with its poor armament, the USS Clinton is still more powerful than that resplendant flagship of the Islamofascists, the INB Moe, shown here being observed by a VBSS team from the US Navy:

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