Spam, spam, and more spam

Rico says he wonders who buys any of this crap, such that it makes it worthwhile for the spammers to even create the damn ads in the first place...
Things he doesn't want:

He has no timeshare to sell.
He doesn't need Viagra, Cialis, or any of those other dick drugs.
He wouldn't buy them from some 'Canadian' pharmacy, even if he did.
He doesn't need cleansing.
He doesn't want Flying Monkeys, or Dancing Weazels, or LightUp Gliders, any of those other stupid toys.
He's not making millions by 'working' on Google or CraigsList or EBay, or anywhere else on-line.
He's not watching bad internet porn.
He doesn't need hearing amplifiers. (What? He can't hear you.)
He won't buy wine, or printer inks, or acai berries, or any of that other crap over the internet.
He doesn't want a free credit report or burial insurance
He's not sending some old lady in the Netherlands (or anywhere else) any money, no matter how pathetic her story.
He doesn't have any jet fuel to sell.
He doesn't want any of the hundred other bogus offers he gets daily.

It's no wonder the internet is so slow; it has to regurgitate all this crap a zillion times a day... (And if he ever finds Russell Carter, he's a dead man.)