Bruce? Reallly?

Slate has an article by  Jordan Weissmann about Russia and, of all people, Bruce Willis:

The important news out of Russia is that the country is bailing out its first bank since the ruble's collapse escalated into a full-fledged economic crisis. The amusing news out of Russia today is that said bank happens to use chrome-domed Bruce Willis in its advertising, making it irresistibly ironic that this institution did not, in fact, die very hard.
First, the important stuff: Russia's central bank said it would pump up to thirty billion rubles into Trust Bank, the country's sixteenth largest bank by deposits, and is looking for an investor to help complete the rescue. According to The Wall Street Journal, Trust Bank "prospered on burgeoning consumer spending" during the good old days of high oil prices. But since their economy nosedived, Russians are spending less and have stopped paying many of their loans. So take this bailout as a blunt reminder that, without expensive crude, Russia does not have a functioning economy.
Also take it as a sign of things to come: one of the central problems facing Russia right now is that its banks and corporations owe hundreds of billions of dollars in foreign currency. And because of Western sanctions over Vladimir Putin's invasion of the Ukraine, they can't borrow more to cover those debts. With the economy imploding, that can only mean one thing: more bailouts to come. Right now, the government is finalizing a law that would inject a trillion rubles, or about eighteen billion dollars, worth of capital into the financial sector. Who knows if that will be enough to do the trick.
Now the fun stuff. According to the WSJ, Trust Bank has employed Willis as a spokesman for four years now. To wit:
Advertisements feature Willis alongside quotes, such as “I’m cool, and so is Bank Trust!, “Trust is like I am, except it’s a bank!” and “When I need money, I just take it.”
Willis first appeared in the advertisements in 2010, and the bank launched the most recent campaign featuring Willis on 24 October 2014. It said in a statement at the time “our capable hero will be seen dealing with force majeure with his trademark panache and wit, all the while helping customers with difficult financial decisions.”
I assume the slogans work better in Russian. And what could be more comforting than having John McClane watching over your finances?
Anyway, it's easy to joke and, lord knows, the Russians love gallows humor. But the country's degenerating economy is a tragedy for its people, even if it seems like a much needed repudiation of Vladimir Putin's petro-dollar-fueled authoritarian government. And it's bound to get worse from here. 

Update on 22 December 2014: This post has been updated to reflect recent currency moves. As of Monday afternoon, a trillion rubles is worth almost eighteen billion dollars, rather than seventeen billion. Thirty billion rubles is worth about a half trillion dollars.

Rico says the ruble is soon to be worth, as they say in Yiddish, bubkis...