18 August 2009

And let that be a lesson to you, you fuck

Courtesy of my friend Tex, this little life lesson, published in the Herald of Houston, Texas on 5 March 2009:
Last Thursday night around midnight, a woman from Houston, Texas, was arrested, jailed, and charged with manslaughter for shooting a man six times in the back as he was running away with her purse. The following Monday morning, the woman was arraigned and asked to explain her actions.
The woman said "I am a waitress at a local café. I was standing at the corner bus stop for about fifteen minutes, waiting for the bus to take me home after work. I was there alone, so I had my right hand on my pistol in my purse that was hanging over my left shoulder.
"All of a sudden I was being spun around to my left. As I caught my balance, I saw a man running away from me with my purse. I looked down at my right hand and saw that my fingers were wrapped tightly around my pistol. The next thing I remember is saying out loud "No way, punk! You're not stealing my paycheck and tips.
"I raised my right hand, pointed my pistol at the man running away from me with my purse, and squeezed the trigger of my pistol six times."
When asked by the arraignment judge why she'd shot the man six times, the woman replied "Because when I pulled the trigger of my pistol the seventh time, it only went click."
Acquitted of all charges, the woman was back at work at the café the next day...

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