Yeah, like that would happen

Courtesy of Rico's friend Tex, this:

A farmer stopped by the local mechanic shop to have his truck fixed. They couldn't do it while he waited, so he decided he would just walk home.
On the way home, he stopped at the hardware store and bought a bucket and a gallon of paint. He then stopped by the feed store and picked up a couple of chickens and a goose. However, outside the store he now had a problem: how to carry all of his purchases home.
While he was scratching his head, he was approached by a little old lady who told him she was lost. She asked: "Can you tell me how to get to 1603 Mockingbird Lane?"
The farmer said: "Well, as a matter of fact, my farm is very close to that house. I would walk you there but I can't carry this lot."
The old lady suggested: "Why don't you put the can of paint in the bucket, carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm, and carry the goose in your other hand?"
"Why, thank you very much," he said and proceeded to walk the old girl home. On the way he said: "Let's take a shortcut and go down this alley. We'll be there in no time."
The little old lady looked him over cautiously, then said: "I am a lonely widow without a husband to defend me. How do I know that when we get in the alley you won't press me up against the wall and have your way with me?"
The farmer said: "Holy smokes, lady! I'm carrying a bucket, a gallon of paint, two chickens, and a goose. How in the world could I possibly hold you up against the wall and do that?"
The old lady replied: "Set the goose down, cover him with the bucket, put the paint on top of the bucket, and I'll hold the chickens."

Rico says never underestimate the inventiveness of older women...