Joke for the day

Rico says his friend Tex sends this one:

Yesterday I was at my local Costco, buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Jake, the Wonder Dog. I was in the check-out line, when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
What did she think I had, an elephant? So, because I'm retired, and thus have little to do, on impulse I told her that, no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost fifty pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet, and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete, so it works well, and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her, no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's ass and a car hit me.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack, he was laughing so hard.
Costco won't let me shop there anymore.