Hey, it might work

Courtesy of my friend Bill Austin, this suggestion from the St. Petersburg, Florida Times:

An idea for fixing America's economy. Instead of giving billions of dollars to companies that will only squander the money on lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan:
There are about forty million people over fifty in the work force.
Pay them one million dollars apiece as severance for early retirement, with the following stipulations:
1) They must retire. Forty million job openings— unemployment fixed.
2) They must buy a new American-made car. Forty million cars ordered— auto industry fixed.
3) They must either buy a house or pay off their mortgage— housing crisis fixed.

Rico says it's so simple, it might even work and, for only forty million, how stupid can it be? (He'll take his million, too, even though he's technically retired; he'll be happy to buy a house and a car and do his part. Hell, he'll even buy a boat...)

The infamous Anonymous has left a comment:
"Uh... 40 million people paid 1 million dollars each is 40 trillion dollars. Not even the government has that kind of money to prime the economy."
Rico says damn, he hates it when someone actually does the math... Yup, too many zeroes.