A wealthy old lady decides to go on a photo safari in Africa, taking her faithful elderly poodle, Cuddles, along for company. One day the old poodle starts chasing butterflies and, before long, Cuddles discovers he's lost. Wandering about, he notices a leopard heading rapidly in his direction, with the obvious intention of having lunch.
The old poodle thinks, Uh oh, I'm in deep doo-doo now! Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the leopard is about to leap, the old poodle exclaims loudly, Boy, that was one delicious leopard! I wonder if there are any more around here?
Hearing this, the young leopard halts his attack in mid-pounch, a look of terror comes over him, and he slinks away into the trees. Whew!, says the leopard, That was close! That old poodle nearly had me!
Meanwhile a monkey, who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard. Off he goes, but the old poodle sees him heading after the leopard, and figures something must be up.
The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans, and strikes a deal with the leopard. The young leopard is furious at being made a fool of, saying Here, monkey, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine!
Now the old poodle sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back and thinks What am I going to do now? Instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old poodle says Where's that damn monkey? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another leopard!
The moral of this story: Don't mess with old farts.
Old age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill, because brilliance and bullshit only come with age and experience.
23 March 2009
Tough poodle
Courtesy of my friend Joan Davis, this story:
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